By Waldo Pancake
A different and excellent present ebook for any highschool or university graduate, Good success With That isn't really your common publication of profound and poignant knowledge for graduates. in its place, this e-book appears to be like on the recommendation you actually need after graduation—and it's all a load of nonsense.
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Additional info for Good Luck with That: Dubious Advice for Grads
35 Give him a detailed description of everything you bought on your shopping spree! 36 Call him several times every day, and then be quiet and wait for him to talk. 37 Always wear more than one layer of makeup! 38 Reapply your lipstick at least every ten minutes! 39 Chew with your mouth open! 40 Use we as often as possible! 41 Party all night before your date. Don’t shower or brush your teeth! 42 Bring a book of baby names to your first date and circle the ones you like with a pink marker! 43 Start to cry after your first kiss!
22 Never laugh at his jokes! 23 Shout out some other guy’s name in bed! 24 Ask him if he goes to therapy and then, whatever the answer, give him a list of therapists you recommend! 25 Make long-term plans on your first date! 26 Order three desserts and tell him how nice it is not having to worry about your appearance now that you’ve “found” him. 27 Arrange for him to pick you up somewhere and make him wait for at least an hour. Make sure not to apologize. 28 Be confrontational at any given moment and argue with everything he says.
43 Start to cry after your first kiss! 44 Live for Publicly Displayed Affection! 45 Take every opportunity to check out your own reflection! 46 Always be ready for a fake headache! 47 Always show your disappointment if he cancels. 48 Let him know you’re more important than anything or anyone and make him feel guilty if you ever notice otherwise! 49 Always get drunk, fall asleep, and throw up if possible! 50 Never leave him alone! 50 Sure Ways for a Girl to Stay Single © 2004 by Pim Pauline Øvergaard.
Good Luck with That: Dubious Advice for Grads by Waldo Pancake